What It Is Really Like In The Trenches

People like themes and color schemes in order to simplify projects that they think will get people to buy things, attend events, listen to radio and T.V. programs or buy a cup of coffee or two.  Maybe it is a weird facet of capitalism and, I don't really like it when it is applied to heart wrenching human drama.  This week, American Public Media, Marketplace is focusing on Jobs or rather, joblessness as one of its weekly themes.  I enjoy listening and today, I felt rankled, irritated and diminished somehow.

Don Peck of The Atlantic Magazine was quoted as saying: "When you have a situation where people just can't find work month after month, it changes them. Being unemployed for more than six months is about the worst thing that can happen to you. Psychologically, it's equivalent to the death of a spouse and is a kind of bereavement in its own right." This is where it went wrong for me.

 Disconnected commenting on the lives of humans changed forever should be more than a soundbite.  "It changes them" is a gross understatement of what it means to be invited for an interview, if you are even that fortunate, told the job has fluctuating hours each week and not full time, no benefits and essentially on call per week along with all the other folks who will consider crumbs, like you, in order to walk forward, belong to a workplace, feel your head lift off of your chest and regain some sense of place and respect in the world.  "A kind of bereavement?"  It seemed like a trite statement without genuine understanding behind it.  How about a kind of murder?

To be sure, I have changed and not always for the better.  Oh yes, I try to put a face on it but sometimes I just crash into self-pity and loathing.  Especially if I felt a twinge of the "I wants" and was not considered.  Sometimes I am able to stop, hear the rejection, and move directly onward.  Today, I received two more rejections from the corporate grocery monstrosity and it felt uncomfortable instead of slaying me.  Maybe there has just been enough good news to offset all of the crap?

I try to rely on what I know about myself as I walk forward, wait but don't wait, enjoy some of my hobbies, exercise and write.  I feel fortunate to have survived thus far and it is the "equivalent to the death of" much more than any journalist with a theme can elucidate. I feel fortunate that I find ways to have fun, connect with other humans, feel love and respect and never stop trying. 

I often play that song that I love from the movie Postcards From The Edge at times like these and always bears repeating:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lkjQSpfW3iw