I have been trying to save my own life and that has taken more effort than my writing can handle. Maybe I am not a writer. Maybe I am just someone who can write. It is as if it comes naturally yet it only comes when I am connected to that soul or self I perceive to be me. For the past two months, that me has been in peril which took all of my attention.
We took a little toodle north to Mendocino County this week to my beloved Mar Vista and "Rosie's Beach." A quick two night stay costs much more than it did in 1987 when I first laid eyes on that sweet spot of earth and sky. However, it was well worth some savings from my last dead end job this summer. I can say that I was glad to be there and we had some unusual hot weather with a chillingly calm ocean that seemed to say that all waves were sent somewhere else. Eerie a bit.
We met several great dogs on the beach-Kai, Dave and Ike. So different from the aging Greyhounds we live with and dogs having fun in the sand, surf and slop of "Rosie's Beach." I had a harder time feeling the joy which I usually do walking with my toes in the sand and I tried, I really did. I just watched and breathed and focused on everything I saw. I drank a lot of tea and tried to not worry about our dogs at home, or my life, or our lives. I did manage to just be for the most part.
Mar Vista has a new gardener though we did not know that as I sat in front of Cottage #1 in one of the weathered chairs drinking ginger ale and watching the sky change. I was there quite a while just doing more of that being, when a black dog rounded the corner of the chicken compound and jogged towards me. I watched, doing more being, and began to ask her who she was. She had a tennis ball in her mouth and no collar. Wonderful coco colored eyes met mine and a wagging tail. She dropped the ball at my feet.
We began to play ball and I thought, where did you come from and who is your person? She had been to the beach I could tell and she was such a sweet girl. I kept asking her and began to worry. I began to plot taking her home if someone had mistakenly lost her. What a great dog I was thinking. Eventually she tired and stood looking towards the Mar Vista enclosed garden with the ball in her mouth. I asked her if her person was up there and she stood staring.
Eventually, the gardener appeared and her ears laid flat to her head and she began to wag her tail. As he came towards us the wagging increased and we found out that Sadie is Patrick's dog who waits for him while he works. I relaxed.
I really enjoyed Patrick's story of living in urban settings as he works his way up the coast of California in life. He knows all about the milky way that shows up in the sky above where we chatted. He lives in the country and farms and works at Mar Vista. Lucky, smart man and lucky, smart dog.
We had to say goodbye to Mar Vista today and I know that this last visit was farther apart than the last because of the hardships we have faced in the last two years. However, that graceful spot of earth still holds a healing power even if I am not healed. I was glad to be coming home to our old dogs and worried especially about Jade, who just gets whiter every day.
Having unpacked, washed the Mini, and done some laundry, I began to hang it outside to dry as our little old laundry man sauntered towards me as is his routine to observe, sniff and pause for more petting upon his diminishing, skinny old man self. Glad to be home for another day of living.
Thank you Mar Vista, I needed that!
